Saturday, July 18, 2015

Keith Bailey of THE UNKNOWN MOVIES looks at an old favorite of mine 'Gargoyles'...



There seems to be a feeling among many human beings that the way we run the planet should be totally up to us. After all, in many aspects we seem to be the best living beings on the planet to be in charge of what happens anywhere in the world. We are the smartest beings on the planet, we can adapt to many different kinds of environments - well, according to some people, that makes the planet ours for the taking. But what if some other kind of intelligent species came to our planet and wanting their own piece of our pie? Over the years, there have been a number of different cinematic and television visions involving beings from some other world suddenly showing up on our world and being forced upon us. One of them was with the movie (and subsequent television series of the same name) Alien Nation. It concerned itself with alien slaves from a distant world getting lost and accidentally landing on our world with no way to move on. In both the movie and the television series, the aliens for the most part were accepted by humans. After all, they looked very similar to humans and had private lives that weren't that much different from many human beings. But in this cynical world of ours, I have the gut feeling that if this premise were to happen in real life, humans wouldn't be so accepting as they were in that fictional universe. My feeling is that something more along the lines of District 9 would happen. If you remember that movie, it concerned a large number of alien refugees from a distant world making their way to our planet. No doubt because they looked, talked, and acted very much unlike human beings, they were treated a lot more harshly than the aliens in Alien Nation...

You loved my BINDER OF SHAME STORY 'Achy Breaky Mythos' before- you'll love it even more in French!

From PTGPTB



Son poster de Dick Rivers sur le mur aurait dû nous mettre la puce à l’oreille. Mais nous voulions désespérément jouer à une partie de l’AdC sans Vagabonds dimensionnels conduisant des camions de glaces. Ce nouveau MJ était Pif-Paf, un vieil ami de Bâtard de Tricheur qu’il avait apparemment rencontré à l’école militaire. C’était un dimanche après-midi chez Pif-Paf et on était cinq rôlistes au teint pâlot engoncés dans une buanderie équipée d’une machine à laver, d’un sèche-linge, d’une table de poker, de chaises dépareillées et d’un poster plastifiée de M. “Est-ce que tu le sais ?”, lui-même. De là où j’étais assis, Dick me jaugeait de son regard insipide...

Friday, July 17, 2015

And now I'm crying big sloppy fanboy tears!

From Daniel of THE HIGH COUNCIL OF TIMECARDS



(Recommended Reads) 'Uncle Bush's Live Funeral' by Scott Seeke


On the publicity tour for the 2010 film Get Low, the first question from the audience was always "What's the true story that inspired this film?" After more than a decade of research, Get Low writer Scott Seeke answers that question with Uncle Bush's Live Funeral. This book tells the incredible true story of Felix "Bush" Breazeale, a feared hermit who attracted ten thousand strangers to the funeral he held while still alive in 1938. Seeke had begun researching Get Low as an outsider, a New Yorker married into a skeptical East Tennessee family. By the time Get Low arrived in theaters ten years later, he had earned their trust. They opened doors that allowed him to finally learn why Bush had his funeral while he was still alive, and why so many people came. He found the moving story of a man trapped by his culture and past, desperate to rewrite his life's story before it was too late. Uncle Bush's Live Funeral shows that any outcast can find acceptance, and any label can be overcome, all masterfully told by Get Low writer Scott Seeke.


Thursday, July 16, 2015

Your mystery date is waiting for you at PLAID STALLIONS!

From PLAID STALLIONS


She's a bloodthirsty cannibal! He's a cold hearted serial killer! Can these crazy kids find love?

From DREAD CENTRAL






Only you can keep my power on!

Don't you hate it when you come up short at the end of the month? I don't see us being plunged into darkness but the electric bill is a tad more than we expected and things are gonna be close.

If you're waiting until September's new material before you kick in the till consider doing it today!

Also I've got the schedule worked out already it is going to go like this;

First week of the month - A new Night Blogger podcast
Second week of the month - A new installment of THE BINDER OF SHAME
Third week of the month - Either some new prose or a new video blog review.
Fourth week of the month - I will crawl under my desk and eat an entire can of frosting

Repeat each month until the year 2020 or a diagnosis of diabetes!



This long distance dedication is to Secundus, Abraxas and the gang from WE HATE MOVIES (@WHMPodcast)!








It's not easy to be the LAST GIRL STANDING.

From BLOODY DISGUSTING


(Recommended Reads) Arcane Solutions (Discord Jones Urban Fantasy Series Book 1) by Gayla Drummond


On New Year's Eve 2000, the stroke of midnight returned magic, both light and dark, to the world. Discordia Jones missed it. Struck down at that same instant like a cut-rate Cinderella/Sleeping Beauty mash up, she awakened three years later to a far stranger life, and saddled with psychic abilities. Working as a private investigator for Arcane Solutions only brings on more strangeness. At least there aren't talking mice...

The 8th Doctor comics are coming!




From DEN OF GEEK
"Five amazing, interconnected new stories take The Doctor on a rollercoaster of threat and misadventure, as he investigates the mysteries surrounding his new companion Josie. Victorian magic shows, murderous trees, lost books, crystalline life-forms, barges in space crammed with the undead... and the grand journey all begins in a sleepy Welsh town... besieged by living paintings! Buckle up for a wild ride that embraces all the Gothic Romance and interstellar terror of the Doctor's eighth incarnation!"





The trailer for THE BOY needs you to call social services STAT!

From BLOODY DISGUSTING



THE CINEMA SNOB survives 'Ghosts Can't Do It'

From THE CINEMA SNOB



Wednesday, July 15, 2015

A request for your patronage...

If you've enjoyed the BINDER OF SHAME stories why not consider making a one time or recurring donation? Your support really matters.


The Binder of Shame by Francis Hogan



Fully Employed But Half Awake
Full Frontal Fatherhood
Back To The Futon
A Little Something For Daddy
Another Alarming Night In The Life Of Al Bruno III
Claw And Order
February: The Month's That Trying To Kill Me
Suburban Wormholes And Plainer Things
Tales From The Suburban Apocalypse
All I Want For Christmas Is A Clean Rap Sheet
Everything Must Go
Sandbagged
HP Lovecraft's 'The Aristocrats!'




The RPG.net Rants
Uncensored, Unforgettable and Uncorrected


Click here to download the Ebook version of THE RPG.NET RANTS



2002 was the year I first started to post stories for the amusement of others. (Aside from that shameful X-FILES fan fiction of course.) I began with these gaming anecdotes that I shared on the forums of RPG.net, a relatively safe haven for me at the time. They were strange little tales told in a kind of screenplay format that I used when I sketched out story dialogue.


The first one was pretty simple but as they went on they became more and more grandiose but they were raw and fun little bits of humor. I never bothered to proofread the things or set up any real kind of coherence or internal continuity- although snippets of these tales do show up in PRICE BEAKS AND HEARTACHES.

I'm posting them to the blog so I can add them to version of THE BINDER OF SHAME I keep here. I will do the first two today and then set up one a week until they're all there.

I've moved on a lot since I first created them but many of the folks that first came to know me through them are still reading my work now and they still keep finding new readers all the time.

If you have no idea what I am talking about prepare to be amazed, amused and offended.

And be warned these stories appear exactly as I did when I posted them on the forums. I haven't tried to edit them for fear of diluting their raw power.

Also I'm pretty damn lazy...

RPG.NET rant #3 A Night At The Inn, A Day At The Racists
RPG.NET rant #4 The God Trip
RPG.NET rant #5 Achy Breaky Mythos
RPG.NET rant #6 Monty Python Mishaps In The Deepest Pit Of Homebrew Hell
RPG.NET rant #7 Kobayashi Maru With Random Violence and Supermodels
RPG.NET rant #8 What Do You Mean You Lost My Wife's Kidney?
RPG.NET rant #9 Never Leave Your Nads Behind
RPG.NET rant #10 Death By Thumbs
RPG.NET rant #11 Night Of The Caped Cadavers
RPG.NET rant #12 Cannibals, Rednecks And Transgendered Astronauts
RPG.NET rant #13 Trapped In Jedi Academy
RPG.NET rant #14 Reservoir Torgs
RPG.NET rant #15 The Wrong Room In Ryleh
RPG.NET rant #16 The Great Gamma World Death March
RPG.NET rant #17 The Bad Rifts Project
RPG.NET rant #18 The D&D Session That Mostly Wasn't
RPG.NET rant #19 The Prequel Trilogy I: The Creep On The Boarderlands
RPG.NET rant #20 The Prequel Trilogy II: The Dead Guy Gets The Pizzas
RPG.NET rant #21 The Prequel Trilogy III: All Hands On Dec
RPG.NET rant #22 The Last Straw Trilogy Part One: Warhammer The Spoilers Generation
RPG.NET rant #22 The Last Straw Trilogy Part Two: Talisman- This Time Its Personal
RPG.NET rant #23 The Last Straw Trilogy Part Three: Once More With Filking
Vampire The Mass Kid Raid: An RPG.NET Rant postscript



The Binder of Shame
The Second Edition

The artwork of Taylor Southerland is Torgo-icious!

From the artist's page


(Recommended Reads) The Whirlwind in the Thorn Tree: Vol 1 & 2 Box Set (The Outlaw King)


From award-winning author S. A. Hunt comes a blockbuster fantasy tale inspired by such old-school fantasy classics as Stephen King's The Dark Tower, C. S. Lewis's Chronicles of Narnia, and Madeleine L'Engle's A Wrinkle in Time.


After coming home from a stint in Afghanistan, veteran Ross Brigham learns that his father has passed away. Dearly departed Dad was a famous fantasy novelist, and the 300 fans that show up for the funeral demand that Ross finish E. R. Brigham's long-running magnum opus.

Ross and two of the author's devotees investigate his untimely death and discover that he might have been murdered...and the time-bending gunslingers of Dad's steampunk novels might be real.

As they try to acclimate to the arid deserts of the author's fantasy world, the three damaged heroes become pawns in a war for humanity's survival. The Muses have grown tired of immortality and now incite atrocities on Earth, trying to lure down a leviathan from the stars.

Can Ross and his new friends stop the scheming satyrs before both worlds are eaten?


CHILLING TALES FOR DARK NIGHTS presents 'The Dunwich Horror'

From CHILLING TALES FOR DARK NIGHTS


The trailer for THE JOKESTERS is no laughing matter!

Found ARROW IN THE HEAD


MrCreepyPasta presents 'Tom and Jerry Lost Cartoon' by KI Simpson

From MrCreepyPasta YouTube page



Postmodern Jukebox and Haley Reinhart did it again!

From LAUGHING SQUID


ROBOT CHICKEN has a crisis over the DC Universe again...

Found via LAUGHING SQUID



If catzookas are criminalized then only criminals will have catzookas!

Found via LAUGHING SQUID



BrendanielReads brings us a different kind of love story: 'I'M GAY FOR MY LIVING BILLIONAIRE JET PLANE'

From BrendanielReads


The gang from WE HATE MOVIES consider 'The Matrix Revolutions'.

From WE HATE MOVIES
As the Summer Blockbuster Extravaganza winds down, the gang tackles the worst part of one of the biggest movie franchises, The Matrix Revolutions! Why did they think it was a good idea to have all sorts of important story elements play out in video games no one wanted? Did we need to meet this many members of Dozer's family? And what's with all the sex clubs? PLUS: The one who owns all the Sunglass Hut franchises in the Matrix is truly The One...


Tuesday, July 14, 2015

(Insane News) Crystal Lake Lawyer Mocked Size of Client's Penis: Complaint

Found via FARK
A Crystal Lake lawyer mocked the size of a client’s penis and challenged him to a duel, according to a complaint filed by the Illinois Attorney Registration & Disciplinary Commission. 

Attorney Donald Franz called client Mike Rutkowski a “small penis a------e” and “insulted Rutkowsky’s manhood and choice of automobiles,” the complaint said. 

Franz also allegedly sent an email to Rutkowski that said, “My mistake, there is only one man involved between us. I challenge you to a duel, you pick the time, place and manner.” 

Franz and Rutkowski were in a dispute over $400. Franz had billed that amount for his “efforts to reduce the assessed value of real property (Rutkowski) had recently purchased,” the complaint said...



Check out the pitch for the short horror film PSEUDO MAN and consider sending some cash their way!

Found via DREAD CENTRAL


Dark Corners Reviews knows THE BEAST MUST DIE

From DARK CORNER'S REVIEWS